Finding Home
by EdwardPlusPandasEqualMe
Summary: When Rachel Black visits La Push again, how will she react to the secret she discovers? And how will she become more deeply involved than she ever wanted to be? Please R&R! Rated T just in case.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: This is an idea I got when I was daydreaming about Twilight once. As far as I know, no one has ever focused on either of Jacob's sisters, but I don't know very much. So, if you know of another one, please let me know. Thanks. :)**

**Disclaimer: I own nothing except Liz ,and I'll be done with her after this chapter. **

**Rachel Black's POV**

It was time to retrieve myself. Ever since I'd gone to Washington State University, a small part of myself realized something was missing. The part gradually grew, and by the end of my junior year I couldn't stand the constant nagging in the back of my head. Go back to La Push, go back to La Push, it chanted incessantly. That's why I was currently packing up all of my essentials that I could possibly cram into one suitcase. I was going to listen to the voice. Ever since I had made the decision, it had taken on a more smug tone as it reminded me of what I needed to do.

"Need any help?" asked Liz, my roommate. I smiled up at her and shook my head.

"No thanks. I'm almost done."

Liz had a quiet energy about her that made her easy to get along with. She had medium length, slightly wavy blond hair that rippled as she spoke. She had also basically created my social life as a freshman. I wanted to meet new people, people different than the ones I had grown up with on the reservation. However, I was inept at actually doing so. Liz was a pro at introducing me to guys without making it painfully obvious that she was trying to find a boyfriend for her single roommate. I was growing less dependent on Liz, though. I could easily start a conversation without it seeming awkward, something the old me never would have believed.

I really had changed a lot, in more ways than one. My formerly long, straight black hair was now short, sleek, and angled. Liz had taught me the basics of mascara and eyeliner. None of my friends back at La Push were ever that interested in makeup, and it wasn't as if Billy was going to show me. I also smiled more, not shy small smiles only for myself to be aware of, but grins aimed at Liz from across the room. My eyes "sparkled" more, or so I've been told by Liz, and I was marginally happier. College was everything that I had dreamed it would be.

As a senior in high school, college seemed to break down any barriers that La Push presented. That's why I had screamed when I found out I received the scholarship. It was a certificate that signified that I could do anything. I was going to have a life outside of La Push. I was going to be somebody! I just wasn't sure who.

I had decided on psychology. How the mind worked fascinated me. That was another reason why I was forcing myself to go back to La Push. It seemed kind of ironic that a psychology major wasn't listening to her own mind.

I had left the old me on the reservation border, and she was begging to be let back in. I had ignored her for as long as possible, but had eventually cracked. I hadn't told Dad, or anyone else in the reservation that I was still in touch with, that I was coming back for the summer. My dad thought that I was staying on campus for all four years, but visiting him wouldn't hurt. If I announced my plans to him, he would probably try to dissuade me from coming, and succeed.

I couldn't let that happen. I needed to follow through on this. After all, I hadn't heard much news from anyone since Harry Clearwater's death. I was worried about Jake. His emails didn't make me smile like they used to, and any details he provided about his life were vague. "I went cliff diving with some of the guys. It was a blast." Dad wouldn't say what was wrong, either. "Jake's just going through a phase. Don't worry about him." That just made me worry more. I would see what was up when I went back. It would be much easier for me to force the truth out of either one in person.

I could also confront the old me better in person, too, where she felt right at home. When I got both the me's together I would force them to get along and play nice if I had to surgically attach them. After that I could go back to college and resume my life. I already couldn't wait.

Liz helped me lug my suitcase to the bus stop and gave me a tight hug before I stepped onto the bus.

"Good luck," she whispered. "I'll miss you."

"I'll miss you too. Remember, it's only for a summer," I whispered back. I told the driver where I was headed and waved out the window until I couldn't see Liz anymore. Then I sank back in my seat and tried to untangle the knot in my stomach. There was no reason to be nervous, I told myself. You've just been gone three years. How much could have changed in three years?

Everything, as I found out.

**A/N: Hope you liked it! If you did, review and tell me why. If you didn't, review and tell me why. Just review! (please)**


	2. Chapter 2

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any characters in it.

I tried unsuccessfully to sleep on the four and a half hour drive from Washington State to Forks. I tried not to think as well, also unsuccessfully. I mainly thought about Dad's reaction. There would be no reason for him to be angry that I could fathom. He would definitely be surprised, surprised that I was back at La Push and surprised at the changes to my physical appearance. He would probably realize that they hinted at an inner change. Would he like that change, that I was becoming more outgoing? Or would he wish for the old Rachel?

I also pondered how to explain my presence to everyone. What could I say? I need to force the old Rachel and the new Rachel to get along, and the only way to do that is to go to La Push. What's new with you? Not likely. I decided to say that I missed La Push. That counted as a half-truth, since half of me really did miss La Push, however repressed it might be.

I also wondered how the rest of La Push would feel about my return. I was friends with Leah Clearwater since Harry and Dad were friends, and she was still there. Were we still friends? Acquaintances? Had she changed after Sam broke up with her for Emily? I may have been at college, but I wasn't completely out of the loop. I couldn't understand why he did it. I saw him and Leah together, and I could tell that he really did love her. Maybe he had found something else with Emily, but I really disliked Sam at this point. I may not have seen her in three years, but I still felt somewhat protective toward Leah, especially after Harry died. She didn't deserve any of this.

I sighed, then groaned internally. I had been thinking about how unfair the world is, then realized that nothing too altogether unjust had happened to me. I had cursed myself.

"Forks, Washington," the bus driver called, snapping me out of my reverie. I was, unsurprisingly, the only person to get off. Fortunately, it was only cloudy and not raining, so I walked through Forks without getting soaked. The town never had any appeal to me. I knew I was too shy to get to know anyone in town, so I didn't try. I had been perfectly content on the reservation. I smiled as I walked past Charlie's house.

Charlie was a nice guy, and I enjoyed listening to him and Dad rant about a bad call or how the Redskins were doing. He had a daughter who came up in the summer for little bit, but then they moved the vacation to California. We were never really friends. We were too shy. I couldn't help but be curious about how she had changed. Had she made any progress in her shyness? I viewed her as an alternate version of myself. When I stepped into La Push the old Rachel threatened to take over. I quickly suppressed the urge and didn't allow myself to remember yet. Keep walking, I told myself. Keep walking.

When the house came into sight, I stopped walking. Taking a deep breath, I continued down the road until I reached the doorway. Should I knock? I thought. Was it still my house? I decided that I would knock, and if no one answered, go in. I rapped on the door three times and winced. The knocking sounded much louder than it should have.

"Hello?" Dad said as he opened the door. I smiled at him.

"Hey, Dad."

When he saw me I could see several distinct emotions run across his face. There was shock mixed with some worry. There was also some sadness, and a little bit of the anger that I could find no reason for earlier.

"Rachel! What are you doing here?" he said, not exactly welcoming me with open arms.

"Well, I missed La Push, so I decided to visit for the summer. Sorry about the lack of notice, but it was kind of a spur of the moment decision," I said, wishing that he would realize that I needed to live here.

"Oh, okay. Rebecca's and your room isn't being used, so you can put your stuff in there. Then," he said, appraising me, "we need to talk."

"Sure, that's fine," I replied. I was very relieved that he had taken the hint. On my way to my room, I noticed that Jacob's was empty. That would be one topic of discussion. If Dad didn't bring it up, I would.


End file.
